Afraid to love
This sight of her really touched him. Her crying state. She looked like an innocent child and an angel whenever she wept. This was what he always fell for. It wasn’t working this time, he wouldn’t fall for it. Lifting himself up from the swivel chair, he found his way to where she stood. He took her in his arms.
“Will you stop crying?” he asked, almost pleading.
“Please, come back to me. I can’t live without you.”
He released her and looked her in the eye. “Its not possible. We’re not meant to be. I really do care for you. I don’t see myself marrying you. Its not like I didn’t try, I did, but it was getting nowhere. It was gonna end anyway,” he calmly explained.
“If its the fights you’re talking about it happens in every relationship. I’ll change, I’ll be better.”
“No, Tricia. There’s no going back. Lets move on.”
“Its easy for you to say because you already have this fiancee of yours. Do you love her? Is she great in bed, like I am?”
Her unexpected question really shocked Jeremy. Was he in love with Purity? He didn’t know for sure, but he had started developing feelings for her. If she was great in bed, he had no answer to that. She’s supposed to be. She’s very pretty and had a lovely body, why shouldn’t she?
“Tricia, I don’t know if I love her. I think I’ll get to love her-”
She cut him off. “So why can’t you get to love me? I bet she’s no better than me. We made great love. We’re- we’re so good together. Come on.”
His eyes darkened. “Don’t talk about her like that. She’s pure, a virgin.”
Tricia stilled for some seconds, then cackled with laughter. “She’s so not your type! You knew the women you slept with weren’t virgins.”
“You knew I was cheating!”
“Of course, I knew. It pained me a lot. But what could I have done? The love I feel for you is so strong that I agreed to let you have them, but you’ll always return to me and my bed.”
“That’s not love, Tricia. If its love, you wouldn’t want any woman to touch me.”
“That’s my definition of love!” she retorted. “If its the sex you want with her cuz I know you’ve never slept with a virgin before, do it and I’d be waiting for you.”
“I am not sleeping with her till I marry her. I have changed and want her as my wife. I really do respect and admire her for her innocence. I’m not going to take innocence and dump her, no.”
“You really didn’t value me. I hate you. You cheated on me with several different women on different occasions and I didn’t complain. I felt every man must cheat. Little did I know I was deceiving myself. You’ll pay for this, Jeremy.”
He shot her an angry look. “How am I to know that you didn’t cheat as well?”
She gravely glared at him. “You’re a bastard!” Grabbing her purse and other stuff from the desk, she snarled at him, “You messed with the wrong woman! I’m now a love-lorn. I’m gonna deal with you and that so-called virgin of yours.”
Something snapped within Jeremy. “Get out of here! I never wanna set my eyes on you, ever again.”
“We’ll see.” She started walking towards the door. When she got there, she regained her composure. She looked at him over her shoulder. He was watching her with eyes, dark with anger and possibly hatred. She smirked. “Jeremy Broderick, I love you. I have made up my mind not to share you with another woman. This is your last chance. If I can’t have you, no other woman will.” she concluded and proudly paraded herself out of the office, slamming the door behind her.
Jeremy collapsed on a chair, the one Tricia had sat on. “Holy shit!” he swore violently. “I regret the day I met that where. I curse the day I agreed to date her. Woe to the day I slept with her. Damn!” he raked his hand through his hair.
“What’s up with the look on your face?” Prudence questioned Purity. “Did something go wrong? Anything that had to do with Jeremy?”
Purity smiled on hearing Jeremy’s name. “No, mama. Just that a mean-looking lady created an ugly scene at the company’s premises as I was about leaving. I don’t know why she did that.”
Prudence heaved a sigh of relief. “Hope she isn’t dangerous? I’m worried about you.”
Purity disagreed. “I don’t think so, she looked like a nervous wreck. Do not be worried. I’m fine.”
“Alright dear, come here.” Prudence wanted a hug from her daughter. To her surprise, Purity jumped into her arms. Holding Purity so close and at her will ignited memories of her childhood. Purity was her favourite girl. They were so close and did so many things together. But as she grew into a teenager, things changed. Due to her fears and insecurity, she began viewing both her parents as enemies instead of allies and they drifted apart. Prudence had tried to mend the rift between them; Purity never gave her that chance. She hadn’t given up on her daughter. “Are you alright?” Prudence questioned, Purity was still in her arms.
Purity laughed softly. “Mama. I’m good. I know you’re wondering why.”
Prudence let her daughter go and gazed at her silver eyes. “I want to know why.”
“Mama, I’m so happy.” Purity jumped up excitedly like a ten year old. “Though that bitch nearly spoilt it. But I’m good.” She gave a broad grin, clasped her hands together and twirled once.
Prudence rubbed her eyes with both palms and opened them again. Did Purity just spin around with happiness? Was her daughter okay? “Its okay, honey. Um, come sit.” She took Purity by the hand and they both sat on a two-seater sofa. Prudence held Purity’s arm. “Tell me, why are you so happy?”
Purity giggled. “Mama. Jeremy and his papa made me feel so special last night.”
Prudence was so happy to hear that. “Really? Tell me about it.”
“Um,” Purity raised her head and rolled her eyes, trying to recall the previous night’s events. “Well, he bought me a new cell phone. The latest. I really didn’t expect it. But I was glad he did. Secondly, he took me to a restaurant and we had a great meal, I was a little bit shy but it all went well.” Purity was talking slowly, choosing her words. At times, she looked away from her man’s gaze. She had never done this before. “We kind of fought over a minor thing, but made up later on. He took me to his wonderful home, it was so so beautiful and cozy. His papa and I had a little chat. He thinks I’m kind of exceptional from all other women and will be the best for Jeremy. Jeremy couldn’t believe I’m still a virgin. I haven’t really felt this happy in a long long time.”
Prudence was full of smiles. “I am so glad I lived to see this moment. My daughter, you’re a good and special girl. You just fail to notice it ’cause you’re always alone, indoors and commanding people to do this or that. Spending time out with others will make you catch lots of fun.”
Purity nodded in agreement. “I know that now. I will try my best.”
“Good. Do you like Jeremy?”
Purity’s cheek turned pink. “Isn’t that a personal thing?”
“Not with me.”
“Okay. Kind of. I don’t know. Maybe.”
It was Prudence’s turn to laugh. She laughed hysterically. Seconds passed, then she gradually ended the laughter. “I know you like him. You will eventually love him if not now.”
“Love? Who’s talking about love? Its only ‘like’. Love doesn’t mean like, neither does like mean love.” Her feelings instantly changed. Hurt could be sensed in her words.
“I’ve always known you to be this frightened or scared when it comes to love. What is wrong?”
She didn’t want to ruin her day. “Lets forget about that. I left the office just to spend time with you. Anything could happen tomorrow or nest. I wanna be a good woman, just Jeremy is a good man.” She fell on her mum’s shoulder and beamed.
“I hope this lasts. Lets go make lunch.” Prudence stood up.
“Okay. You’ll tell me about Emily. I really want to know lots about her,” Purity replied, standing up.
Prudence was bewildered. “Okay.”
Tricia sat all alone in the dark. Her hair was a mess, she looked as if she’d lost a beloved in death. Little rays of lights coming in from the window revealed littered bottles on the ground. She’d been drinking. Drinking ever since she got back from Jeremy’s place of work. Why would a man make her go so crazy? She’d loved him since she set eyes on him. Been a good friend to him. The relationship hadn’t been so nice, but they never discussed it. Now, he wants to get married. Not to her, to a pure, virgin. Jeremy was attracted to virgins? She wasn’t but her slept with her. And every touch from him made her fall more and more in love with him. Jeremy was hers. She wailed bitterly. She placed her hands on her lips. “Jeremy is mine,” she muttered in between sobs. “Its over, will never share him again. He is mine.”
To be continued…………
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